Develop Shared Interests Intimacy

Take Time to Develop Non-Sexual, Non-Bedroom, Intimacy in Second Marriage.

Second Marriage: In your second marriage, a real interest (and the resulting intimacy) can be developed.  

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Second Marriage 

Take Time to Develop Shared-Interest Intimacy.

Richard Sides

Second Marriage: Anyone can share a sexual intimacy but only you offer that unique intimacy. You win!

The most intimate relationships, those more intricately intertwined, are the most stable and long lasting.

A fake interest,  one conjured up in order to appeal to another person and get them  interested in you, conveys the illusion of an opportunity for intimacy. No  wonder your partner is disappointed to find out he/she was deceived.

On the other hand, a real interest (and the resulting intimacy) can be developed.  

I am amazed at how interesting virtually everything is when  I know more about it. On the surface, most things appear pretty dull. When you dig deeper and gain an understanding of the players, the tactics, the intrigue (in sports, work, church, you name it), those formerly dull areas become exciting.  

If you want to be more intimate, be more involved.   Don’t fake it!

If you do, you are not only lying, you are missing out on the fun!    Take the time to actually find the fascination, to become involved, and you will not only be rewarded with increased intimacy, you will have grown as a person.   

So, how do you get there?

Ask your partner (or the person you would like to have as a partner) about the subject. Become an aggressive student, learning all about it, from history to the present, and then start anticipating the future.

Or surprise your partner (or potential partner) by studying the subject on your own.  Let him/her know you figured that if someone as interesting as this partner found the subject interesting, you would be "missing the boat" not to know more about it, too.

You have just become irresistible.  

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We all want to be around people we can relate to, and this is most important in the areas we are most interested in. The more obscure and unusual your shared interest, the more valuable the bond.

Anyone can share a sexual intimacy but only you offer that unique intimacy. 

You win!

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Reprinted with permission: SOLOfor Singles.

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Note: The opinions expressed herein are exclusively those of the writers and do not necessarily reflect the position of CyberParent. They are not intended to take the place of advice of a health professional whose advice you might need to seek.