Surfers write on being a stepparent. Letters fromCyberParent readers.
I’m getting married next year and want to adopt my fiancée’s daughter. I’ve searched the web for information about this, but all the resources seem to be for people searching for a child to adopt. Can you tell me where I can find information about the laws and costs, if any, in Massachusetts that will enable me to adopt her daughter and to have her name legally changed? I really appreciate your help!
My wife & I married a year ago w/five teens between us. Her four andmy one. We did OK until mine, a boy then living w/his mother came to live w/us. Problems started immediately. He was dropped off the first afternoon before the other kids got home from school. As soon as stepbrother one got home he immediately accused my son of stealing $10, demanded he show him what was in his pockets. Their was produced a $10 bill. My son said his mother had given it to him, which was confirmed. When I refused to search his belongings, my wife flew upstairs and began tearing through his stuff. She and I had a confrontation. That was 9 months ago. To this day my son says he did not take the money. We still have respect, authority and discipline issues too many to mention. Suggestions? We are a Christian family. My wife and I are being counseled. No blended family experience or counseling to date. Thanks for anything you can offer. We live in the Dallas area.
I have been married for 7 short months and have a stepson who is nine. I upwith two wonderful parents and so did my husband. My husband at 23 had gotten his girlfriend at the timepregnant and she decided to have the child. Needless, my husband had a hard time coping with thefact that he was responsible for someone other than himself and it took him 3 full years before fully accepting his son with open arms. He does not have custody of his son except for weekends in which before we got married consumed of grandparents taking care of him parttime. My husband does not know what it is really like to take care of a son because of everybody always helping out. Where do I come in? We met three years ago and dated seriously for a11/2 before getting engaged. Throughout this entire time he never imposed any responsibility onme nor did our plans ever get effected by his son over the weekend. Now that we are married everything has changed. Every weekend we have his son and we have no time for each other. During the week we are so busy working there is rarely time to spend together. I was completely thrown for a loop. I feel a lot of built up resentment towards my husband and towards his son because I didn’t know the full story. I wish I was more understanding butI feel my life was stripped away from me as was his when his son was first born. I am notable to do all the fun things that go along with first being married and I hate that. Anyadvice? I’m desperate!
Note: The opinions expressed herein are exclusively those of the writers and do not necessarily reflect the position of CyberParent. They are not intended to take the place of advice of a health professional whose advice you might need to seek.