Emails and Letters about abuse.

Abuse: Readers and surfers write: Questions,letters, venting and pleas for help from CyberParent readers.

Letters from Surfers.

My daughter recently turned 18 and has gotten involved with a 28yearold man who has been married twice. He says his wives were crazy andthat is the reason he is no longer married but we doubt him. He istrying to keep our daughter away from us and isolating her from thepeople who love her the most. She has quit college and sits in a mobilehome all day waiting on him to return home from work. He has notallowed her to work. She does call occasionally and came to see usduring Christmas but he will not talk with us or get involved with ourfamily at all. We are just about crazy because this was the sweetestkindest child (who was also a virgin) prior to this man. We feel sohelpless and do not know what to do. He has convinced her that she isan adult and we cannot intervene in their lives. We have even consideredsnatching her and taking her to a hospital but he will still be in townwhen she comes home. Any suggestions will be greatly appreciated. Janet

I don’t know where to start, I am a single mother who decided to get adivorce after 9 yrs. of abuse. I where 2 hearing aids, and I was diagnosedwith Manic Depression after the deaths of my parents both a month apart. IMarried exactly a Month after my fathers death, I was a Postal Carrier, andhad a lot going for me. The abuse started after the divorce I had aurinary track infection where I was peeing pure blood, my ex did notbelieve me, I was traveling at the time, when we arrived at our destinationI had to ask my friend for a clear glass, and my ex went into the bathroomwith me and I had to pee in front of him, this really did not matter to him.He refused me treatment. I then had a nervous break, my ex wouldconstantly tell me not to go to the doctors that they just wanted my money.I ended up getting social security, I guess that hurt his pride. Thingsreally started getting worse. I soon became pregnant I knew I would be thebest parent around if nothing else. Through out my pregnancy as I grew hewould not let me buy cloths, nor food for myself and the baby, he wouldtell me to just drink milk, and bread, that’s all I needed. The truth washe needed it for his drugs. Due to me being pregnant I had to get help soI told his parents, that was the worst thing I could have done. After thebirth of my child I hemorrhaged twice again he did not want me to go to thedoctors, I finally went and had to have emergency surgeries. I bled forapproximately 10 months after that and ended up having to have ahysterectomy. As my Child started growing I knew he could not talk rightagain I would consult with my husband only to here him say, the Dr. justwant your money, My son developed warts on his feet may 3 at first still,the same old story. I finally got brave and took him to both the hearingdr. and to a podiatrist, my son had over 100 warts removed off his feet,and he had a very sever speech problem. I took him to an early learningcenter who had a speech therapist come to our house about 2 a week. As I started meeting friends, they would tell me my ex was making fun of myhearing, and they would ask why he didn’t help with the child, they alsowould try to talk to him about taking care of need before his drugs. Ithan developed a tumor in my breast, again he did not want me to havesurgery, I did but the evening after the surgery he knocked my stitches out.I then knew the abuse was turning physical, I filed for divorce. I havesole custody of my child, now but after our house sold 4 years a go someman called me about land. I bought the land, and was set up, buy my exhusband, I have been to court over, and over again, I was arrested, I wasfollowed, and Harassed to where I had to Move my brand new double wide offof the land. I Paid cash to one man, and received a deed from anotherman., and had an option logged at the court house for another part of theland in which the switched it into someone else’s name, and tried to get mefor criminal trespassing. I do have a civil suit against these people. Then I received 2 letters from the health department that my child had ahearing problem, I took him to Ky. School for the Deaf. Yes he does have ahearing problem I had to get a court order because my ex husband refuses tolet him where his hearing aids. They get him Barbi dolls for Christmas;they tell him he need baby pull-ups, and are also very verbally mean to him.I think to get back at me. My child is 9, and he tells me if he has tolive with his dad he will kill himself. Again I thought this was serious. We went to court again, but when it came time to go to court, I received anaffidavit stating he was fighting for custody, because of my manicdepression, Can any one lead me to the right person for help, I do knowone thing, They say there’s not no such thing as a perfect parent, but I cansay I am sure close to one.Please Respond for support !!!!!!!!!

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