In many places in the world, children will grow up not having any close bonding with the men they call their father.
In most third world countries, men spend as little as less than 8 hours with their children in the space of one week.
It’s unfortunate, because men also love the beautiful experience of parenting like every other person.
The big question is: Why don’t men spend quality time with their families and children? What is chasing them away from their homes?
Answers to these questions define the factors that make men look less loving to their families, especially children.
Why Don’t Men Spend Quality Time with their Families?
Most of the time, what defines what a person gets are their gender and age.
Many cultures have given the men the title of “head of the family”. Being the head of the family, a man has the responsibility of fending for the family.
The wife and children depend on him for feeding, housing, schooling and maintaining good health. Rightfully, the men have accepted this title and the responsibility that comes with it.
This is why a man will leave his family for weeks and focus on the work that brings him money with which the family lives fine.
The children are too tender to understand why the dads are not always at home to assist them with their little tasks. They believe that the dad is not up and doing because the man is not meeting up to their expectations.
Getting to understand these things is always at an age when the children are probably no longer with their parents.
What is Chasing the Men Away from their Families?
This takes us back to the first question. In many cultures, the men have been conditioned to see providing for their families as their sole responsibility.
Apart from a few countries that give paternity leave, a greater proportion of the population, especially in most third world countries, rarely earns enough of what their families need for sustenance.
This is evident in the fact that almost immediately COVID-19 struck, and the respective governments imposed a lock-down on the citizens to mitigate the spread of the virus, forcing people to stay indoors.
Most families immediately slid into severe hunger.
The majority of the men spend almost all their time, looking for what their families will eat. It is certainly not true that they hate spending time with their families and children.
What they hate, however, is the sense of failure in their responsibility of providing for the family.
How Does the Society View Men’s Relationship with Their Children?
Men are largely misunderstood! Or rightly put, men are poorly treated for the level of effort they put in for the family welfare.
Not being with their family most of the time like most women would do has made the so-called head of the family less likely to be loved adequately.
Different members of the family view him differently and often, not in the best light.
The children want to spend time with their father. They want to learn the ways of their father.
They want him to help them with their basic school assignments, pamper them when they feel offended, and help them develop a better understanding of the world.
They want the dad to be the one leading them through the popular fun-filled Fortnite Party.
When the father fails in this category, the children will begin to miss him. But as time progresses, they may stop missing him.
At this point, he becomes their “official” father and not much of a loving father. His absence no longer means anything to anybody.
In fact, he is better out there to get something for the family than stay at home and laze around.
Well, that’s exactly what he has been doing. That’s how he has been able to ensure that there is no shortage of food items in the kitchen. That’s how he has been sourcing for the children’s school fees. That’s how he has been able to raise money and buy a home for the family.
Unfortunately, He is Misunderstood!
The wife, on the other hand, has her own requests and perceptions about the man who is the father of her children. There is always this emotional streak attached to relationships of this sort.
The wife always wants two things simultaneously. They want affection and at the same time, they want all the money that can help in making their lives better.
Having accepted to serve for the later, the man may not be able to have all the time to stay with the woman and pamper her as she would have loved.
They may complain, or even fight for it but what is clear is that these are just two opposing demands.
If he spends the time working for the money, he will not have the time to spend at home with her.
And if he accepts to spend most of his time at home with his wife, he may not be able to provide as much money as the family needs.