Q & A: stepparentsing advice given by other stepparents.

Stepparents and professionals answer questions from stepfamilies.


Stepparents’ Questions and Answers

Stepparents and professionals  answer questions about stepfamilies.

As the blended family becomes more prevalent, we findstepparents giving each other advice. This is a page for stepparents and professionals toanswer questions.


To Whom it may concern:

I’ve been with a man for the past year and a half and he has a two year old son. The son accepts me fine but the ex-girlfriend does not. She will not let me kiss his son good-bye or when I drop him off she yanks him from my arms. She has also taught her son to tell me I am bad or a bitch.

Do you have any advice for me?

I love this little boy to death,
but I don’t want him to start hating me because of things his mother says about me. We only see him once during the week and every other weekend so I only have that little time to show him that I love him. She is one of the biggest influences in his life, what can I do? 


Answer 1:

When he starts to call you names, pick him up and twirl him around,
tickle him, or do something playful where you both laugh. He doesn’t
know what bitch or hate mean. He is like a parrot at this age. Don’t actshocked, act tickled.

Rather than wait for the door, tell him good-bye in the car or other
private place with a hug, kiss, and "I love you," then walk him to his
mother so she can not take him from your arms. He will quite naturallybe more interested in hugging and paying attention to his mom when hegets home so say your good-byes in another private place.

Leave quickly when you get him home. Don’t give her time to be ugly orspiteful in front of him. And realize you will have a hard time competing at this time with a mom he has not seen in a day or so, sodon’t try.

Children love someone who smiles, so keep smiling at him, no matter whathappens with his mom. And… get down on his level when you play. Hug him often and thenlet
him go immediately if that is his desire. Children love a quick hug thenback to play. Read to him. Hold him in your lap and teach him to love books. This is a
great way to get kids to sleep.

Leave the discipline to his dad when you can–you be the playmate andhis mother will have a really hard time stopping a relationship fromforming at this age.






Answer 2:

 I  agree with the above answer. But I would like to stress the part about giving mom as little time as possible to act negatively in front of the child. Even let the son walk the extra few steps to his mom while you concern yourself with putting down clothes and the like. Leave without speaking to either of them if she can not be pleasant.

Good luck

Additional information about stepparenting,stepfamilies.

More Questions and Answers
Previous Questions and Answers

Note: The opinions expressed herein are exclusively those of the writers and do not necessarily reflect the position of CyberParent. They are not intended to take the place of advice of a health professional whose advice you might need to seek.


Large Play Mats roll-up for storage between  rainy days or stepkids’ visits.

Review mat
| Buy mat

Review mat 
| Buy mat

Go Away Monster!
Board Game
Review game |
Buy game

Don’t Make Me Laugh, Jr Board Game
Review Game |
Buy Game

Board Game
Review Game Buy Game

Tin box Version Cranium’s Cadoo, Family Game
Review game
| Buy game

Review Ready Bed with easily inflatable mattresses for grandkids’ visits or popular gifts with boy’s or girl’s favorite characters.






Outstanding Links
Singles Profiles
Dating Web
Dating Again
Dating Tips 
Dating with Kids 
Earth Singles  Intimacy-Opposite Sex 
Local Singles Webs
Love Poems & Quotes
Lying and Dating
Safely Single
Single Rose
Single Seniors

Singles Meet 
Singles Store
SOLO for Singles 
Speed Dating  
Suddenly Single

Alternative Medicine

Baby’s Sign Language

Be a Matchmaker 
Birthday Book 
Blended Family
Boys: Parenting
Breast Feeding 
Choose Personal Matchmaker
Discipline Your Child
Dr. Luv
Eating Healthy
Esteem for Children
Gender Understanding 
Games for Kids

Gifts for Men

Girls: Parenting
Heart Express
Holistic Health
Kids’ Activities 
Intimate Lovers
Love & Chemistry 
Love & Marriage  
Music & More Music

Organic Garden

Organic Food

Second Marriage

Shopping Place 
Single Parents
Spoiling Infants
Sports & Recreation
Teach Kids Right/Wrong
Teens: by/for teens   
Toys for Kids

Travel with Kids 
Ultra Music 
Living Tips Beauty Tips 
Dating/Meeting Tips for Singles 
Love & Romance Tips 
Lunchbox Notes 
Math/Science Fun for Kids Stay in Touch with  Kids-Grandkids 
Free Newsletters
Earth Friends 
DFW Happenings 


CyberParent Recommended Gifts for Kids and Step Children

Review All Rescue Heroes

 Rush Hour Board Game-Puzzle
Review Game | Buy Game
Buy Extra Cards

My First Words Matching Game 
Review Game
Buy Game

Review pop-up bus

Buy this truck 
Review All Trucks

Review Ready Bed with easily inflatable mattresses for stepkids’ visits or popular gifts.

Buy  doll house  
Buy AA



Buy this doll  Buy AA doll


Review All the Wiggles

Returnto Stepparents Directory.

Book Review:  The Blended Family Sourcebook Book Review:  Blending Families
Book Review:  The Courage to Be a Stepmom Book Review:  Divorce and New Beginnings
Book Review:  Stepcoupling Book Review:  Step Wars
Book Review: Step Wise Book Review: Surviving Your Adolescents.
Book Review: 1-2-3 Magic
Book Review:  The Combined Family Book Review:  Living in a StepFamily

home.GIF (548 bytes)cyberparents.GIF (706 bytes)grandparents.GIF (701 bytes)single parents.GIF (712 bytes)stepparents.GIF (902 bytes)for kids only.GIF (692 bytes)for men only.GIF (887 bytes)for women only.GIF (918 bytes)leisure.GIF (564 bytes)lifestyles.GIF (851 bytes)relating.GIF (592 bytes)shopping place.GIF (737 bytes)table of contents.GIF (517 bytes)you.GIF (512 bytes)contact.GIF (627 bytes)


Copyright © 1997-2006 CyberParent. All rights reserved.
Certain images: Copyright © 1994-1996. T-Maker Company. All rights reserved.
Many photographs, letters, questions, answers, and items of advice in the StepParent Webwere submitted by our surfers. We thank you for participating.

Note: The opinions expressed herein are exclusively those of the writers and do not necessarily reflect the position of CyberParent. They are not intended to take the place of advice of a health professional whose advice you might need to seek.

You might also like More from author