Letters5

Emails and Letters from CyberParent readers.

Surfers write on being a stepparent. Letters fromCyberParent readers.

StepParents’ Letters Step Parenting

Hi:I’m getting married next year and want to adopt my fiancée’s daughter.I’ve searched the web for information about this, but all the resourcesseem to be for people searching for a child to adopt. Can you tell mewhere I can find information about the laws and costs, if any, inMassachusetts that will enable me to adopt her daughter and to have hername legally changed? I really appreciate your help!Will

My wife & I married a year ago w/five teens between us. Her four andmy one. Wedid OK until mine, a boy then living w/his mother came to live w/us. Problemsstarted immediately. He was dropped off the first afternoon before the otherkids got home from school. As soon as stepbrother one got home heimmediately accused my son of stealing $10, demanded he show him what was inhis pockets. Their was produced a $10 bill. My son said his mother had givenit to him, which was confirmed. When I refused to search his belongings, mywife flew upstairs and began tearing through his stuff. She and I had aconfrontation. That was 9 months ago. To this day my son says he did not takethe money. We still have respect, authority and discipline issues too many tomention. Suggestions? We are a Christian family. My wife and I are beingcounseled. No blended family experience or counseling to date. Thanks foranything you can offer. We live in the Dallas area.Jack

I have been married for 7 short months and have a stepson who is nine. I upwith two wonderfulparents and so did my husband. My husband at 23 had gotten his girlfriend at the timepregnantand she decided to have the child. Needless, my husband had a hard time coping with thefactthat he was responsible for someone other than himself and it took him 3 full years beforefully accepting his son with open arms. He does not have custody of his son except forweekends in which before we got married consumed of grandparents taking care of him parttime.My husband does not know what it is really like to take care of a son because of everybodyalways helping out. Where do I come in? We met three years ago and dated seriously for a11/2before getting engaged. Throughout this entire time he never imposed any responsibility onmenor did our plans ever get effected by his son over the weekend. Now that we are marriedeverything has changed. Every weekend we have his son and we have no time for each other.During the week we are so busy working there is rarely time to spend together. I wascompletely thrown for a loop. I feel a lot of built up resentment towards my husband andtowards his son because I didn’t know the full story. I wish I was more understanding butIfeel my life was stripped away from me as was his when his son was first born. I am notableto do all the fun things that go along with first being married and I hate that. Anyadvice?I’m desperate!Life Gone

CyberParent Recommended Reading for More Information: Introducing the StepParents’ Web StepParent Web Directory Q & A Series Blended Family Blended or Blender? New Stepparent: Now What? Stepkin: An Evolution What Is a Single Stepparent? Building Kinship Short and Long-Term Visitation Second Marriages with Children Both Are Non-Custody Parents Six Common Stepfamily Conflicts Thanks, Mike! Doggy-Blue

One Non-Custody Parent/Spouse Has Visitation Rights

Stepparents Seek Advice from Other Stepparents.

Stepfathers: A fact of life in America today.

Time-out: An Effective Discipline for Stepfamilies.

Multiple page series of letters about stepparenting from CyberParent surfers.

Genetic Engineering: What Is It and How Can It Affect My Family? Book Review: The Blended Family Sourcebook Book Review: Blending Families Book Review: The Courage to Be a Stepmom Book Review: Divorce and New Beginnings Book Review: Stepcoupling Book Review: Step Wars Book Review: Step Wise Book Review: Surviving Your Adolescents. Book Review: 1-2-3 Magic Book Review: The Combined Family Book Review: Living in a StepFamily

Note: The opinions expressed herein are exclusively those of the writers and do not necessarily reflect the position of CyberParent. They are not intended to take the place of advice of a health professional whose advice you might need to seek.

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